Tom Collins has a great ad makeover and article in the current issue of Direct Magazine. Perhaps even more valuable than the article and makeover are his quotes of David Ogilvy like:
"Advertising agencies…are now infested with people who regard advertising as an avant-garde art form. They have never sold anything in their lives. Their ambition is to win awards at the Cannes Festival. They bamboozle their unfortunate clients into paying millions of dollars a year to exhibit their originality."
and
"On the average, five times as many people read the headline as read the body copy. When you have written your headline, you have spent eighty cents out of your dollar. The headline is the ‘ticket on the meat.’ Use it to flag down readers who are prospects for the kind of product you are advertising.
What you're really doing with your headline, then, is separating out the readers who would be interested in what you are selling from those who wouldn't.
If they aren't prospects for what you sell, you don't want them reading your ad. Period."
Anyone involved in creating ads should read this article.
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